Thursday, November 28, 2013

你, .........等不到了吧

你,                           .........等不到了吧

Hi Elg,

Wow, seems like it's been a very long time I've seen your silly dog face.. To be frank, I never had the strength of courage to face the reality, the fact that you, are already gone. A lot has happened since we last talked, needless to say, you're part of what happened...  I hope that you've been hearing me everyday when I talk to you before I leave for work and everytime before I sleep.. Your 1st death anniversary just passed, I can't imagine what would it be like, if you're still here.. Most likely, more neat and fat cos you'll bug me to trim your dog fur, and you'll eat & eat & eat. Hah hah  Nothing can fill this hole that I've carried in my heart since the day you went away.. When all the time it feels like just yesterday that we just drank, feeling the pain all over again.. Starting to get better to deal with now I guess somewhat normal to feel like this.. It's been a month and it seems like just 1 hr ago. The pain is there.. May be in the back sometimes but its always there. Everything is to the very extreme point, It's your unfortunate first month, and again, I want to let you know, I still wanna see your face, smack you, call you doggie, rant and cry at you.. Everything still look the same as it did except the air & leaves & atmpsphere & my phone, but your favourite chilling spot and also the most boring spot, oceanz have regenerated. A new generation, Lol.. Okay it feels so surreal now typing to you while my eyes are almost filled.. I just wish that there was something we could have done to fix it or make things a lil different sometimes I felt like it was my fault that I did not make it to see you & you gave up your last breath... I wish you were here again, and then all my troubles/problems won't be such a pain in the very depth of my heart hidden, feeling so tight.. I wish you were here again to make me laugh & bring me out to drink, I wish you were here drunk, calling & shouting out my name. But never possible again... Till we meet again, on your birthday.. You've been 1 of the gr8test friend of mine, but I've got no farkin' chance to even let it out to you at all. I'm grateful for the days you've been there for me, to wipe my tears, to try your fucking best chasing the sadness away not by badmouthing the people whom caused me to be, but explaining & advising in some other positive ways. I'm sure you're aware of how I'am doing now & you're sure happy.. But best friend, I never will be...

So much misses,
Elp. (The Elp you always shout)
Bui Qi. (The fat qi you always call)

You're remembered, with loves.

Always and forever...





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