My eiffiel tower is almost done, like finally I managed to put my hands on & draw with a black marker. Those days with just pencil marks are awful! Managed to turn in early last night with my fat tiger. But got no idea why I woke up at 5am out of a sudden checking my phone, & thinking it was already evening until I realized the living room is still quiet. My fat went to pack breakfast for me, momma & granny :D My fav from 302, but it taste so different today. So I sent him a text, thanking him for settling my meal & conveniently told him the food sucks today. Muahaha. Expected, he was making noises over the phone. Mahjonged with the two old ladies..........

Thank you Liling dabian.

This is an overdue picture, she actually got the eyedrops for me

before my bkk trip. And also both dresses fits me perfectly!

Love.

My entire life is a continuous cycle of convincing myself

that I can survive and then convincing that I can't...

I am not depressed. I can still smile at pretty things, and laugh

when jokes are funny. I can still talk to people and sometimes

enjoy nice days.

But when I go inside, when I am alone, there is something broken. And I fall into a sadness so sweet, that it engulfs me. I look in the mirror and I don't like what I see. And the tears always almost fall, when I'am falling asleep. And I miss something... that doesn't exist. 

I'am not depressed, I've just been sad for awhile

but I can still find the lights.I can still smile.

I tell myself, "you're not alone," 

yet when i hey in bed at night my sadness envelops me rather than my blankets

and my head is propped up by a monster of thoughts rather than my pillows,

and by the weight in my chest, it feels as if the mattress is laying on top of me,

instead of the latter. And all I know through this confusion is when I sit up and

take a look around. The only person there, is me. and the only person who cares, is me.

and the only person who understands, is me.

And gosh, I feel so alone.

But no, even tho' he's lying right beside.

I feel as though my ribs are breaking apart 

with the ache that's aching my tiny little vulnerable heart.

When I'm upset, I shut myself down.

I have no motivation for anything. 

I tell myself that nobody cares. 

even though I know some do (don't feel unfair)

I think about all of the negative things

I could possibly think of.

I give myself all the pain 

thinking I deserve it.

I'm not sure why I do that,

but that's just how I am.

And it've been like that, 

for far too long.......

Never forget 3 types of people in your life:

1 - Who helped you in your difficult times 

2 - Who left you at your difficult times

3 - Who put* you in your difficult times

Met up with Joanna.Yee on sunday, it was a last min decision, and that mad girl came naked face running like crazy ending herself up panting like she've just finished a marathon! o.O Anyway, splendid trip! Kinder chocolates at only $1.95 per box! Stockkkk upppp. Did a lil catch up before we part. Thanks sweetheart.

wo de fat

 Supposedly to watch movie with his cliques & gfs, but gave it a missed cause he thought we couldn't make it. So I wasted like more than an hour preparing myself -.-" then staying at home waiting for him to come home..................... What a monday night.

He came back with these on Monday! ^^

MY LOVE.